I'm real sucks in handling my own stress and problem.
I salute myself in crying skills. I have built in auto-activate-crying-system, I guess i cry almost everyday this week. Already 21+ years old, but still cry like it will never memalukan myself.
I've got caught into 2 trouble now, even it is the same apply to all my coursemate, but I am the significantly worst decision maker.
First thing that bother me real lots.. the INTERNSHIP from 1st Oct2010 till March2011. Got no idea why i would so stress with that? I will give you the scenarios.
1) We got the internship briefing last 2ndJune, Utar gave us brief talk and ask us to submit our form on 2ndJuly, which consist of 3 top companies that we wish to go. In the event where non of those company accept us as their interns, Utar will allocate us randomly according with the list of companies they have in hand.
2) We are advised to contact with the companies we wish to go to ensure they accepted us. Well, we have only one month time, which initially I though we wont be having enough time to get the confirmation from company.
3) I have no car. So I actually depends on my another friend who lives near to me, about which company she chose so i can tumpang her car. We ended up decided call up for many firms and apply for them.
4) Things happen to be we send the resume at the different time, and I sent too many firms compared to her. This is an uncertainty which we don't know who will interview/accept both of us.
5) Then, I got 2 public listed (big) companies ask me to go for interview, one is in JalanYapKwanSeng and another 1 at MontKiara. This 2 place is impossible for me to go without a car, and my friend that tumpang me did not get any respond. This leads me into trouble, I don't know whether i should go for the interview. What if they accept me and ended up I can't go there work without car. My reputation will be gone for ffk the company. So I've decided to ignore unless my friend got the interview call too. This is one uncertainty.
6) There is also another 2 companies which is smaller structure company confirmed me without the needs to interview. I am thinking worse come to worst i will go either of this company if end up my friend is not arranged to work at the same company as me.
I'm in the dilemma whether i should right away rejected the company's interview or I should give it a try. Which way i should put it in so i won't really offend the company (ConstructionIndustry is too small that the reputation can be gone in a sec in the industry, i don't want after graduate i tak dapat job cox of this. T>T) I am basically still pending the company's interview which i think it is very not right.
Now..... My sis ask me if my parents can get me a car before my internship starts, will i choose to go the big firm for placement. My mom insist that is better i go for a bigger structure firm, this cause she had argument with ma dad for not buying me a car earlier on. This made me feel real bad, I don't wanna be the issue for them to quarrel about. And this is another uncertainty i will have to think of now. What if they really get me a car? Then should i cepat cepat go interview now? What if end up didn't? SO!! I DON'T KNOW HOW!!
Second things that real bother me, and also the one that make me feel such a real loser, is my final year project (FYP). I got FYP briefing last Wednesday, telling us we have to choose our supervisor and our fyp topic by this sem before we go for industrial training. Hearing of this sem seems we still have many times right? NO! definitely NO! There are lecturers that we can ask to be our supervisor, but there are definitely quite a number of lecturer that we SHOULD NOT go for due to some reasons. So, I have to go for one before all nice nice lecturer been taken! I can see friends around me is like GREATSALE IN SINGAPORE. All cepat cepat choose their preferred lecturer!
And ME???!!! I TOTALLY LOSE MY DIRECTION!!! I don't know what I want to do and which lecturer i want to choose. This made me feel so sucky! Why can't I be like any others who so clear with what they want??!! Why am i always DONT KNOW? I am all stressed out! I DON'T KNOW HOW I DON'T KNOW HOW!!
Please tell me how... Please tell me... I am just afraid to take any step that i will maybe regret for it later....
1 comments:
Hey, first things first, relax. You can be scared and worry about your things, but do it with a calm mind.
With the interview thing, just go for it. Your reputation doesn't start until your results are shown. Even if you don't have a car, you can ask if the company provides a driver; if not just decline it...It's not a big deal to be honest.
Just choose what you have interest in rather that which one is the safer one. I would say you're ONLY 21 years old, so why so scared of regrets? I know how you feel. You're afraid that what you choose to do will cause problems for the people around you right?
Sometimes it is fine to be selfish. Think of what you really want to do, and do it. Uncertainty is sometimes what we really need in our lives to find the answer.
I think i wrote enough lol....well i bid you good luck, and keep a calm mind. Oh, and it's okay to cry ^^.
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